For me, blogging is like journaling…out loud. And I mean really loud. In spite of the fact that there is no guarantee that anyone else will ever read what I’ve posted, it often feels like I have made my personal opinions and semi-private thoughts the newspaper headline of the day. Or that I am sharing my internal musings over the air waves of radio, giving anyone who will listen an all access pass to the ongoing monologue in my head…thankfully it is very rarely a dialogue, but I digress.
I can be quite an opinionated person. Yet when it came to throwing my heart and soul, my personal views, out into the blogosphere – hitting “Publish” for the very first time might have been on my top ten list of terrifying tasks. But I knew that I had to do it. Days passed with my waiting draft taunting me, itching to be released into the world of other people’s critiques and criticisms.
Plus there was the fact that I had made the effort to document my perspective, and the next logical step was to push the button or abandon the whole thing. It was now or never – commit to my point of view or call my own bluff. So I hit it; I hit that button with the abandon of someone going sky diving or bungee jumping, telling the contrary emotions rising up like bile – “It’s too late now. There is nothing to be done about it, but wait to see what happens”.
And then I felt – freedom. Freedom to be who I am, to have an opinion, to give the world a glimpse of the woman that I envision I am inside my head – the woman I am determined to become.
Blogging has helped me to, little by little, liberate my creative, not-so-serious self; that part that yearns to be unhindered by thoughts of “no one will read this”, or “why would anyone care”. It has forced me to call my fears out into the daylight, allowing me to see them for what they really are – mere shadows or apparitions of powerless imaginings pretending to be formidable foes and frightening creatures.
So why a blog post about blogging?
One – Because this is my way of acknowledging the fact that I have started the process of strengthening my creative muscles, in a rather public way. Like working out for the first time in a new, oversized & crowded fitness center, and feeling like everyone is watching you.
And Two – Because if you are reading this and wrestling with your ability to stand by your own thoughts and opinions, I hope this gives you the courage to take that next step – Raise your hand, Speak up…or Just Hit Publish!
Peace & Love